PUNNY!!!

Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.
A man's home is his castle,in a manor of speaking.
Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away.)
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
Every calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.
Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture is a jab well done

Poor Jokes (Engineering)

Q. A man went to the church and told the priest,"Father, I have sinned ninety times". Father said, "beta dont worry u will get caught 45 times." How did Father work this out. Was he a clarivoyant?
A: Becoz sin 90=cot 45

Q: What do you call the most religious unit in electric science?
A: Ohm

Q: what is the volume of a person who has lost all his memory in a typical (filmy) accident !!!
A: 1/3 pi*r*r*r
bcos he says
"main KOUN (cone) hoon !!??? "

Q: Why Dont people laugh at a complex joke--> P + iJ
A: Because the Joke part of it is imaginary!!! !

Q: Wat do u cal a cylinder of radius "z" units and height "a" units?
A: Pizza!
Coz volume of cylinder= Pi * r * r * h
=>pi*z*z* a
=Pizza

Q: Once all chemistry professors went to see the movie "Iron Man" expecting the iron man to be a lady. Why?
A: Because in chemical terms
Iron = Fe
Man = Male
So Iron Man becomes Fe-Male or female

Q: What is the Population Control Program of the Chinese Government called
A: Chini Kam

Q: wat wud an angrez say to his Anpadh hindu naukar if he wants him to open the door!!!
A: "There Was A Cold Day " (say it fast)

Try to Read

amazing...

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid, too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe tuo fo 100 anc.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.

If you can read this, your brain is 50% faster.

Figure out the Puzzle

See if you can figure out what these words have in common.

1. Banana
2. Dresser
3. Grammar
4. Potato
5. Revive
6. Uneven
7. Assess

Are you peeking or have you already given up? Give it another try. Look at each word carefully. (You'll kick yourself when you discover the answer.) This is Cool.



Answer: No, it is not that they all have at least 2 double letters.



Answer: In all of the words listed, if you take the first letter, place it at theend of the word, and then spell the word backwards, it will be the sameword. Did you figure it out?